avablog

If I have to read about one more celebrity pregnancy, I am going to lose it. Up yours, Gwen Stefani–you 38-year-old, ab-obsessed hussy. Up yours, Angelina Jolie–you cheating homewrecker, posing as a saint. Up yours, Brooke Burke–pushing out your fourth damn kid from that bikini-worthy body at age 36! *sigh* Bitter much, Leah? Why, yes, […]

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That number represents our chances of getting pregnant each month, according to the doctor we saw this morning (when we conceived Ava, our odds were more like 18% to 20%). If we undertake IUI, that goes up another 2%. If we do IUI with a drug like clomid or letrozol, we get another 2%. So […]

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I submitted my third and final semen sample the Wednesday before we left for vacation, and it turns out it came back totally normal. Which, of course, is good and bad. So, next step, I guess, is to head to the fertility clinic for an appointment and to possibly do an IUI treatment. Or two. […]

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It stands for hysterosalpingogram. A radioactive dye is inserted into the uterus while under an X-ray machine. An image is created that lets you know if there are any blockages or other problems with your uterus or fallopian tubes. It’s pretty amazing to watch. The hospital sent us home with a CD of images from […]

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We experienced a major potty training setback yesterday. Ava had a total of four accidents, including #1 and #2, between 6 a.m. and midnight, when she wet her bed. Leah suspects a bladder infection, but Ava hasn’t really been complaining about any pain. And it sounds like she’s been getting to the bathroom. Just not […]

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I was giving Ava a bath last night when, out of the blue, she stuck her hand out toward me and said, “Pull my finger!” I obliged, and the moment I gave it a tug, a little “pflup!” reverberated off the bottom of the tub, its accompanying trail of bubbles wiggling to the water’s surface […]

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I don’t know if I almost never have dreams, or if I simply never remember the dreams I have. Seems like the latter is more likely. When I do manage to remember one, it feels like a special event, even when the dream is stupid, like the one I had last night. While every other […]

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As of this morning, we’re on to month 12 of the Great Baby Hunt. Leah’s pretty upset, as usual, but I’m trying to remain optimistic. Not necessarily about having another child, which really strikes me as something that’ll happen or not regardless of how badly we want it, but about the odds of life going […]

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I never thought it would happen this soon, but there it was, last night at the dinner table, when Ava looked over at Leah and asked her where babies come from. The topic came up in the course of Ava discussing again how much she likes babies. Leah’s a big believer in laying out the […]

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Right here: Dr. Carol A. Livoti, a Manhattan obstetrician and gynecologist and an author of “Vaginas: An Owner’s Manual” (Thunder’s Mouth Press, 2004), said vajayjay and other euphemisms and slang offend her and can render women incapable of explaining their symptoms to health professionals. “I think it’s terrible,” Dr. Livoti said. “It’s time to start […]

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A quick summary: The funeral sucked. It sucked for all the usual reasons it sucks to attend the funeral of a beloved 36-year-old woman cut down smack dab in her prime, and in addition, the north side of Chicago is a mess. We timed our departure to coincide perfectly with the end of the Bears […]

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These last couple days have been mentally busy and tiring. We’ll get the results today of our latest semen analysis, which I’m not optimistic about (don’t ask me why). But it is what it is. Last evening, I drove down to Mount Pleasant with three colleagues to watch another of our coworkers in a play […]

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And maybe even more enjoyable.

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Since we’ve been over this topic already in the not-so-distant past, I’ll simply reproduce these Spinal Tap lyrics below to illustrate my frame of mind this morning: Working on a sex farm Trying to raise some hard love Getting out my pitch fork Poking your hay Scratching in your henhouse Sniffing at your feedbag Slipping […]

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OK, well, it’s not so private, obviously, is it? And I’m not really ashamed, since there’s not much I can do about the situation. But I love the provocative title, and I’m sure my RSS subscriber(s) do(es) too. Leah stopped off at her Ob/Gyn’s office this morning to pick up another analysis kit for me […]

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We were all getting ready to go this morning when Ava went into the bathroom and asked for some privacy (as she always does when there’s a #2 on deck). After a couple minutes I peeked in to see how she was doing, and she was standing next to the toilet, peering into the bowl. […]

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Leah called at noon today and got the results of our recent tests. Drum roll, please…. Leah’s blood work came back all normal. So that’s good. Most of my sperm analysis came back fine. My pH was a little high. Normal range tops out at 8, and I was an 8.2. Always overachieving. Doc doesn’t […]

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Your skin was brown and smooth, and your body was round. You were quiet and intimidating. You had a challenging mouth. You came wrapped in plastic, I in my black dress socks. I sat with you nestled between my thighs until it was time to drop you off.

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