I accompanied Leah to an Ob/Gyn appointment yesterday to see if her doctor had any words of advice about getting pregnant (aside: As I was writing that sentence, I first wrote appt. instead of appointment. I wonder why we bother to write out that word anymore. Is there anyone who doesn’t know what appt. is the abbreviation of? I guess I can see using the full word for an audience that isn’t familiar with English, but otherwise…gosh, appt. sure is a time saver when typing). She didn’t have much new to say, really, other than to tell Leah to throw away all her calendars and charts and thermometers and everything else and just have sex whenever she feels like it. I think Leah understood. The main message was just to relax. The average time to conception for couples actively trying to conceive is six months. I figure since we got pregnant with Ava the first month we tried, that means we won’t be on the far side of the average until 12 months this time, which is three months away.
The doctor sent us away with orders for some blood work (for Leah) and a semen analysis kit (for me). I’m glad it’s an at-home kit, though I don’t suppose it would’ve been any problem to “produce a sample” at the office (wow, that’s one sexy euphemism, eh?). The sample has to be produced at least three and not more than seven days since I last ejaculated, and then it has to be kept at body temperature and rushed to the lab within 30 minutes. Without even trying, I can imagine 13 scenarios from which hilarity could ensue in this process. Of course 12 of them involve being pulled over for speeding and having to explain why I have a black plastic cup full of semen under my arm.
So, we’ll get the semen analyzed early next week sometime. I’m almost hoping they find something wrong with me. It would give us an answer one way or another, and it would take the pressure off Leah. That said, I’m pretty sure the answer to all this is just to calm down and proceed as normal (stay tuned next week to see just how wrong I can be!). Time always seems to stretch to infinity when it stands between you and something you want very, very much.
I really should create a TMI category…. It’s never too early to read the words “semen” and “ejaculated,” is it? I don’t think so.