I’m not going to address this directly to you, unborn baby, but you should certainly feel free to read along, if you like.
I was talking with my virtual pal Danny today about the fact that I’ll be almost 40 when this new baby comes into my life. That means nearly 60 when s/he graduates from high school (knock on wood). To paraphrase the inimitable DLR from Hot for Teacher, “I don’t feel 40.” And, unlike my lovely wife, I don’t give a whit whether I look 40, either. I’m in good health. I have a job (for now). And a house (for now). Why, then, should it be that I experienced a moment’s panic the other day at the oddly sudden thought that I’m going to have an infant in my house on my 40th birthday?
In the old days, when I was “on Facebook,” I noticed that most of my contemporaries appeared to have finished having their kids a couple years back, if not before their 30s set in. Was that the smart thing to do? I have to wonder. I know that, in general, people are living longer, healthier lives these days. If that trend continues, I should be able to give my kids at least a couple good years before I fall down the inevitable slide of senility and decay.
When Leah was pregnant with Ava, our friend Ed used to joke that she was classified as a geriatric pregnancy and therefore high risk. “Ha ha.” You can imagine how that went over with Leah, even if you’ve never met her. But if there’s ever been a cover model for The New 40, it’s Leah. She’s nothing like geriatric. And because women tend to do better in the aging department than their male counterparts, I’m counting on her to pick up the slack for me in my golden years.
I guess I’m just fretting for the day I’m not able to keep up with the kids on their adventures, if they’ll have me along at all.
View Comments so far ↓
1 Vanessa // Mar 10, 2009 at 2:14 pm
When Chris’s dad turned 40, he had almost 3 month old twin girls and an almost 17 month old son. (His mom’s a year younger than that, so she gave birth to twins at around 38. I can’t imagine.) They didn’t plan it that way, but I think they’d say things worked out pretty well. They drive to IC practically every weekend to take us out to eat, and seem to constantly be flying somewhere or another for vacation. So they’re still pretty active, and you and Leah live a MUCH healthier lifestyle than them, so I think you can count on many, many good years with your kids.
Interestingly, I’m getting the kid thing out of the way young in large part due to the age of Chris’s parents and my dad – I want to be sure Cadie gets to know her grandparents. Strange how that worked out.
2 map // Mar 10, 2009 at 2:22 pm
The grandparents issue is one I hadn’t really considered, but it is a thought. I have only great memories of my grandparents, even though I didn’t really get to know most of them as an adult. My mom’s mom, whom I was close to, passed away the month we found out we were pregnant with Ava. I’m hoping our little ones’ grandparents stick around for a while yet.
3 Leah // Mar 10, 2009 at 2:52 pm
I think about the age issue, too, honey. If you hadn’t waited so long to propose, we could have gotten an earlier start! LOL! Anyway, I think we’ll just have to take care of ourselves and hope for the best. My dad was 41 when my sister was born, and he’s still around and very involved in her life; she’s 32 now. (And technically, you’ll have a toddler in the house when you’re 40–not an infant!)
4 map // Mar 10, 2009 at 3:05 pm
Someday I imagine my worries will be of whether I’m trying to be too involved in my kids’ lives.
5 jwh // Mar 10, 2009 at 6:18 pm
my husband was 40 when hunter was born, and 42 when magnus was born, and he worries about exactly the same things…
personally, i think that the most compelling argument for having children at a younger age is the fact that younger people seem to function better on fewer hours of sleep.
6 Cindy // Mar 11, 2009 at 1:22 pm
My father-in-law is 68 and in the best shape of his life (far better shape than Mitch or me) and this gives me great optimism that Mitch and I will be able to keep up with our kids specifically when the focus becomes less on keeping them safe, teaching them manners, and dealing with tantrums. Don’t fret
7 Ben // Mar 13, 2009 at 8:00 am
You and Leah are super active, healthy people. Your 40 will be someone else’s 25.
P.S. how did I not know about this “new blog” until now.
8 GG // Mar 14, 2009 at 9:18 pm
You might hope for a girl because as Harv said when I was pregnant with Rachel and he was darn close to 42, ” I hope I don’t have to drag my ass into a football stadium when I’m almost 60″
9 map // Mar 15, 2009 at 7:42 am
Gosh, Georgie, that doesn’t sound like Harvey.
10 BWG // Apr 7, 2009 at 9:43 pm
Mark,
When did you leave FB? I found myself looking for some new photos and you were gone, just like that. Ahhhh, but you can’t get away that easy.
Leah looks great! I’ll let you know the next time we’re in IC and we can grab a beer.
If you really want to feel good about yourself, consider this. I bought a minivan this weekend. I had no choice, #3 is on the way and it’s the only way to transport 3 under 3.5. It gets even more depressing. I actually like the thing.
11 map // Apr 7, 2009 at 10:04 pm
Couple weeks ago, Ben. I’m glad you found me. What’d you get, minivan-wise? I’m a Toyota fan, but I have to admit a certain weakness for that Honda model.
12 BWG // Apr 8, 2009 at 8:57 pm
Odyssey all the way. I spent weeks comparing the two and in the end, the Honda won hands down on all but one minor point. The fact that Honda is giving them away this month doesn’t hurt either, whereas Toyota is not. I think I bought it for about $8,000 under MSRP.
This is my first Honda and minivan. I have to say I am really impressed with the fit and finish as well as the drive. Honda has perfected the people mover. If you want more details, shoot me an email or call. I’ll save you weeks of comparing.
13 jwh // Apr 9, 2009 at 9:11 am
bwg? as in benjamin william greazel? (sp?)
14 BWG // Apr 9, 2009 at 4:08 pm
Correct. Do we know each other?
15 jwh // Apr 9, 2009 at 4:20 pm
oh, i’d say so… seeing as how we were roomates in college and all.
i had no idea mark was such a collector…
16 BWG // Apr 9, 2009 at 6:40 pm
Jen Webb? Could it be?
17 map // Apr 9, 2009 at 7:07 pm
Jen, Ben. Ben, Jen.
18 BWG // Apr 9, 2009 at 7:11 pm
The second I clicked on her link and saw Hunter’s curly hair I knew it had to be.
I don’t want to hijack Mark’s thread, so email me Jen. bgreazel@cohenfinancial.com
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