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OK, I get it

February 28th, 2009 · by map · 4 Comments

My dad was over for dinner last night. Just pizza, nothing fancy. Ava was running around, doing her own thing, while my dad and I sat and talked in the living room.

When it came time for him to leave, I asked Ava to come over and give her grandpa a hug. She refused. Then she ran up the stairs without saying goodbye.

“That’s OK,” my dad said. “I’ll get her next time.” I opened the door for him and then watched as he walked, alone and huddled against the cold, to his car. I was suddenly painfully aware of every time I’d ever refused to hug one of my grandparents when I was Ava’s age. I was upset with Ava, but I was more upset with myself. And upset that I’d never get to give those hugs now.

Tags: Ava

  • Leah

    There’s nothing like parenthood to make you acutely aware of your own fleeting place in the cycle of life.

  • Leah

    There’s nothing like parenthood to make you acutely aware of your own fleeting place in the cycle of life.

  • http://mama-tchou-tchou.blogspot.com/ Jenny

    Ah, yes. I don’t remember not giving those hugs, but as I watch ours and others grow and refuse and say, “blech!” and turn away and so on, I think of all of those things we forget as we grow, and how much of parenthood is painful learning and teaching. Our boys have been caught saying things like, “Yuck! X is not pretty! X is OLD,” by the way. The shame parents are privy to… The number of times we’ll find ourselves saying, “That is NOT how you were brought up, young (wo)man,” or some such. Ach…

  • http://mama-tchou-tchou.blogspot.com/ Jenny

    Ah, yes. I don’t remember not giving those hugs, but as I watch ours and others grow and refuse and say, “blech!” and turn away and so on, I think of all of those things we forget as we grow, and how much of parenthood is painful learning and teaching. Our boys have been caught saying things like, “Yuck! X is not pretty! X is OLD,” by the way. The shame parents are privy to… The number of times we’ll find ourselves saying, “That is NOT how you were brought up, young (wo)man,” or some such. Ach…